LGZ Online - Marky B on a Comeback Tour

Drinks - No.3 The Slapper

Share GBH in a glass - The slapper is a cocktail, formulated by Marky B for one purpose only...boozing on a  budget.

The slapper name was given to the drink for three reasons, it's cheap, it's nasty and and your likely to regret it in the morning!

The story goes that Marky B was going through a little, "ahem" financial difficulty but wanted to maintain meaningful, drunken relations with his mates. Having made it to the pub with a pocket full of shrapnel and a head full of ideas he began to make enquiries about various drink prices. Having found out that a double shot of Sambucca was £2.50 he decided to add Soda water and a wedge of lime which are both free, making the drink cost a grand total of £2.50.

After four slappers he realised he had struck gold and named his concoction and began telling everyone he was knee-deep in slappers, had just chinned a slapper, had multiple slappers and so on...

Anyway, recipe is below and disclaimer which you really should read before drinking my cocktails

Ingredients:

    * Sambucca 50ml
    * Soda
    * Wedge of Lime
    * Ice

Instructions:

Take a tall glass and drop in some ice, add the Sambucca and Soda Water , then throw in the wedge of Lime and enjoy.

Disclaimer:

Please drink respnsibly, I will not be held accountable for any loss or damage to property or health resulting from consumption of this drink.

“Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.” Homer Simpson

Drinks - No.2 The Jelly Baby

First devised on the European leg of an "Impotent Ants" tour, during
what is now a famous interview, lead singer Mark and lead guitarist Chris started mixing some drinks.

This had hilarious results as slowly the interview descended into drunken chaos.  The secret recipe was eventually released by the band and named "The Jelly Baby" due to its taste.

Ingredients:

• Vodka 50ml
• WKD Blue 275ml bottle
• Sainsbury's Bucks Fizz
• Red Bull 1 Splash
• Ice

Instructions:

Take a tall glass and drop in some ice, add the Vodka and WKD Blue , then top up with the Bucks Fizz and finish off with a splash of Red Bull.  Throw in an orange slice if you can be bothered, it will count towards your five a day.

Low and behold we have Jelly Baby!

Please drink respnsibly, I will not be held accountable for any loss or damage to property or health resulting from consumption of this drink.

Life's a waste of time, time's a waste of life so let's all get wasted and have the time of our life.  ~Author Unknown

Drinks - No.1 Poonjuice

Poonjuice

Created in the naval port of Portsmouth in the UK, Poonjuce was invented by the infamous  Poonstars. 

The Poonstars were a group formed from ranks within Portsmouth University, running various club nights and some of the wildest parties the student union will ever see.  The Poonstars needed a drink to help them forget... well, everything!  As such Poonjuice was born.

This drink comes with a serious warning not to be taken lightly.  Poonjuice has a list of side effects as long my arm, these include...

• Blurred Vision
• Impaired speech
• Dizziness
• Vomiting
• Reduced control of motor functions
• Irreparable liver damage
• Complete short term memory loss
• Unconsciousness
• Alcohol poisoning

It is my advice that nobody consume this drink, and I will not be held accountable for any loss or damage to property or health resulting from it's consumption.

If this drink still appeals, you have my respect and here is the recipe...

Ingredients:

• Vodka 50ml
• Vodka Kick 1 Bottle
  • Cherry, Apple & Tropical flavours are best
• Lots of Ice

Instructions:

Very simple, take the above ingredients and put them in a tall glass, then stir.

Voila - Poonjuice

Next from Marky B's cocktail corner will be the legendary but mysterious Jelly Baby watch this space.

“I feel sorry for people who don't drink.  When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.”  - Frank Sinatra